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28 July 2012

Mommy Guilt

Sorry to get all heavy on everyone but this has been bothering me for a while and I am curious!
Am I the only one that has too high of standards for themselves and then feels a little guilty when things aren't perfect!

I have always struggled with that, but I feel like as I try to let the small things go I am getting worse!
Is it just us or do other things make us feel like we have a huge to do list for everyday for every aspect of our lives? Books, movies, magazines, Pinterest and Blogs?!

If we made a list of everything a GOOD mom/wife would do in a day
 based on all these pins and blogs and other media.

For just ourselves we would be expected to exercise, make sure we look our best everyday, ( and have that smokey eye look down to a 5 min process) have time for whatever spiritual reflection we choose and have time with our friends for girls night once a week, and maybe even a separate book club,
PTA and Moms group volunteering.

For our kids we are suppose to be with them 24/7, babysitters and nannies are for working moms and celebrities, shuttle them here and there and expose them to important activities, play dates and sports. The library for story time and don't forget the park. Make sure their meals and snacks are organic and healthy and on a schedule in between naps. Don't forget about teaching them at home, sign language, reading to them and setting up crafts for them to do. Manners, alphabet, counting, colors and all those other little things for the little kids. There is even more as they get older.

At home there is always laundry, a toilet that needs scrubbed, vacuuming, organizing, more laundry.
Bills to pay, homework to help with and home cooked meals to make, some kind of dessert probably with Nutella in it. Grocery shopping and every other errand. Dealing with fruit flies, cutting and printing coupons, making teacher gifts and planning 50 dates for you and hubby. And decorating something with chevron and chalkboard paint! Really the list could just go on and on!

Well I just can't do it all and I don't understand how any 1 mom can do it all well.
Yes of course I try but I don't succeed and I am over feeling bad about it!
I am seriously doubting I am the only one who has laundry in the dryer (on de-wrinkle for the 3rd 4th time) and that just can't be THAT big of a deal in the whole scheme of things.

I do love Pinterest but I will say that sometimes seeing everything on there
makes me feel a little less than a good mom.
And why are we constantly comparing what we are doing to what other moms are doing?!
What does that accomplish?
I hope none of my posts have come across as fake or made any
 other mama feel like they weren't doing enough!
What do y'all do when/if you feel like you aren't doing enough?
Have do you keep the big picture the big picture?

4 comments:

  1. Good thoughts...
    I learned (the hard way) that it's ok to say no! It's very hard though, because most times you are saying no to very good things!
    Just say" No "to school extras, including volunteering. No to kids activities and playdates unless you can handle it or need it that day/week.
    I've also learned what makes me feel like a productive mom, wife and person. If I do ONE of those things everyday, then I feel great at the end of the day, rather than overwhelmed and guilty.
    (feeling guilty about something means you did something wrong. In most cases we are not doing something wrong, by not doing everything we wish we could!)
    My good mommy days are when I have read to each child...that makes me feel great. Anything else we may get done (Pinterest craft etc) is just gravy. : )

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  2. I am totally one of those people that NEVER says NO! Great idea, I am sure I will feel strange the first few times!

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  3. I feel guilty A LOT! I really don't want to feel that way anymore either. I just keep trying to figure out how to do it all. I started jotting down a daily schedule hour by hour today...I've probably done that 5,000 times.

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  4. Love this post, Brittany! I have constant guilt, feeling like I could always do MORE. It's great knowing that other moms feel that way!

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